Oranges, Apples, & Kiwi

One day my friend and I were on the Metro in DC going from our REALLY nice hotel to some lovely tourist, nationally historic spot. On this Metro, a super cute boy walked on....(allow me to elaborate: tall, dark hair, clean cut, handsome, charming, great smile (it lights up his whole face)... you get the picture). I tried hard not to look at him the whole time... I think I failed. He got off a few stops later. I turned to my friend and asked if she had seen this Apollo like man. She hadn't and became upset that I hadn't pointed him out while he was on the Metro.

She then proceded to say that we ought to have a code. She outlined that if I saw a cute guy, I was to say, "I think I'll have an orange." If she saw a woman she would love to look like, she would say, "I think I'll have an apple for breakfast."

Later when we were getting off of the Metro (at the Metro Center) to switch to the Red line, we were walking along and I was reading the map. She was just walking along. I looked up and she was about to run over a little person. I tried to warn her that she was about to run over her, but alas I was too late. She clobbered the poor thing.

She turned to me again and asked why I didn't warn her. She now said that I ought to say "Kiwi" if she were about to squish a little person. We were to the escalators at that point. (Now, you know I am a classic blonde...) Knowing I was going to mess up this system at some point or another, I told her in all honesty, that I was going to get them all messed up and just start saying, "Apple, Orange, Kiwi!"

She looks back at me and says, "You mean you'll be attracted to an androgynous short person?"









Highly unlikely.